Member-only story
Losing a Career Can Feel Like Getting A Divorce
Surprising parallels when you divorce your career especially at mid-life, mid-career stages.
Job loss can be extremely painful because we have to start over and create a new identity. Clients tell me their feelings are similar to what they experienced during a bitter divorce — a special form of the midlife crisis.
Losing a career or business can also be a source of grief, anger and frustration. Starting a new business is an end as well as a beginning. You may feel as though you are getting a divorce after a twenty-year marriage. Here’s why.
1. Sometimes the career leaves you.
The field wants “younger people.” Or you have to change in ways that violate your sense of self.
2. Sometimes you leave a career that seems perfectly wonderful and fulfilling to those on the outside.
“The money’s so good,” your mother says, “and it’s not as if you’re scrubbing floors all day. Can’t you just hang in there and pretend you like it?”
3. You feel disloyal.
After all, you’ve gained a lot from this career. For the rest of your life, you will view the world through the lens created by your training and…
